We feel very strongly that we need to possess certain things in order to be happy. But this idea, that our possessions make us happy relies on one assumption: we are able to possess things.
What, exactly, are we able to possess?
Love is the one thing that we all feel that we need to possess, yet how can Love be possessed? Possession assumes ownership. Yesterday I related a story about my ex-girlfriend. I did not go into much detail except to say that I have been asked by her to forget, and to never contact her again. I am having a difficult time accepting this reality, because I do not feel I did anything to deserve this treatment. But what is really bothering me? I want to have certain things from my ex-girlfriend. I say I forgive her, yet I want her to say she forgives me. I want to possess her forgiveness. I want her to smile again. I want her to accept me. I want her love. But I cannot possess any of these things. Even if I was receiving her forgiveness and her acceptance and her Love, what really would have changed about me?
Why do I feel the need to possess her forgiveness, to possess her acceptance, to possess her Love? It is because a part of me feels empty. It is because I feel that I have made a mistake, although I am not sure what that mistake is. It is because I feel that her rejection of me has somehow lessened me.
But what is really happening here? I have created a need inside of myself and told myself that if I possess one thing, that need will be filled and I will become whole again. But how was that need created? I did not always love my ex-girlfriend. In fact, I only met her about a year and a half ago. So why do I need her approval to be whole?
The Truth is that I do not need her approval. I do not need her forgiveness. I do not need her Love. Love is not something we possess. How can you own someone’s love? How can you control it? Hold on to it? It can’t be done. Love is not a thing that needs to be possessed. Love is created. Love pours forth from us when we are actively engaged in another’s growth. Love comes from a connection to the Truth and blossoms when both parties tend to its fruit.
I cannot possess my ex’s Love. I did not possess it before. That does not mean we did not share Love many times. But that is the thing. Love is not owned. It is shared. When we try to own it, we stiffle the ability to create it. In our attempts to possess Love, we always lose it. Not because our intentions are impure. But because we are working in opposite directions to Love. Love is shared and created, never owned or guarded. When we ask for Love, we will be turned down, every time. Not even because our lover necessarily wishes to deny us. It is because we are asking the impossible. We ask for them to create something and give it to us. Love does not work that way. Love must be actively engaged in by both parties. We cannot ask for love to be given to us. We must actively create Love at all times, with everyone we meet. Only then, with enough practice, will we begin to see the Love returned. Not because we have asked for it. But because we are Love. Eventually, we will meet the right people who will recognize the Love within us, and we will be satisfied.
But being Love and living in awareness implies patience and repeated failures as we perfect ourselves. We cannot give in to wants and possessions. We will never have the things we want to possess anyways. Not because we should not have them or do not deserve them. But because we ask the impossible. We ask to own something that cannot be owned!
At the Alternate Economy I have been trying to push one idea. This idea is that if we can change ourselves and live in Love, we can become Love. We can remember that love is good, love is easy, love is beautiful, love is COMING, love is given freely and love is everyone’s. At the Alternate Economy, we begin to realize that we truly possess nothing. Nor do we need to possess anything. What is it, that we truly need?
We need Love. We need personal space. We need to pursue our passions. We need to feel secure in our access to resources.
What else do we need?
At the Alternate Economy we will begin to see that when we live in Love, money can be used to create whatever we need. And what do we need? We need equality and freedom and an easier access to Love. We do not need possessions. We need Hope. We need a future. We need to look inside of ourselves and make the transformation to Love. We need to stand tall together. We need to do this. Today.
Today I will accept that I cannot possess another’s Love. I can only create it with everyone I meet from this point forward. Today I am Love.